Written by Will of the Wisps
What is BDSM? It stands for Bondage, Dominance, Submission/Sadism, Masochism. BDSM is an umbrella term for unusual sex acts that conservative Christians reel back in horror whenever it’s brought up. There are many websites dedicated for adults-only to share in these unusual sex acts with other consenting adults. Some acts include bondage – which can range from tying one up simply by the wrists and/or ankles, to full body, strung up from the ceiling. Dominance/submission includes a wide range of sex acts from simple man/woman taking charge, making demands with only some words and/or manipulation of the submissive partner’s body, to one partner pretending to be a “slave master” and the other partner the “slave”. Sadism/masochism is under dominance/submission, but one inflicts
pain on the other partner. All sex acts under BDSM are between consenting adults and each party is role playing. Roleplaying, for those who don’t know, is basically like theatre. You are pretending to be a character that’s not you, such as a nun or priest, a cop or robber, etc. and you take the dynamics of those characters and exaggerate them into a sex scene.
Why am I talking about this? Isn’t that kinda icky and also super irrelevant? I wish it was
irrelevant because this is weird to talk about – sex should be kept behind closed doors. However, I have to discuss this topic because it is extremely relevant to police proactive sex stings and internet crimes against children. For those reading with a loved one who’s been caught in these stings, chances are, he has a kink, or he’s at least open to trying kink. While I know the parents seriously don’t want to think about their son being interested in BDSM and partaking in these acts, I’m sorry, you’ll just have to try viewing it as if he’s not your son, but someone else’s.
Many of the press releases I’ve read about FBI catching what they believe to be a “predator”,
involve the BDSM sex act of Ddlg. Ddlg stands for Daddy dom (dominant), little girl. First of all, no, this is not literally about dads having sex with their daughters. Get that out of your head right now. Ddlg is between consenting, UNRELATED adults who would never consider having sex with their own kids. Ddlg also encompasses the sugar daddy kink where a man wants to spend his money on a younger woman and spoil her, in exchange for sex. This act has less focus on a romantic relationship and closer to friends with benefits, which is where you have a friend you mutually agree to have sex with, but don’t extend it to romance.
FBI doesn’t seem to know what this is, therefore they believe if a man continues corresponds
with a female who claims she’s of minor age, that he must be aware that this is, in fact, a minor and doesn’t mind. If the FBI does know what this kink is, they are taking it too literally. So let’s reframe what’s actually going on, more times than not: a man on an adult-only dating website either leaves an ad online or sets up a profile and he vaguely mentions that he’s into Ddlg – perhaps calling himself a “daddy” and not directly mentioning the kink. He wants a “young lady to spoil”, and he’s specifically looking for younger women (of age). Or perhaps he’s open to this kink and doesn’t mind if the females responding to him start roleplaying as the “little girl.” A woman responds to him, claiming she’s 11-15. A man on an adult-only dating site is not going to immediately believe or think “this is literally a minor” because minors aren’t allowed on this site, this can’t be right. She must be roleplaying, as is the custom.
So once contact is established, the woman will talk about her fictional schoolwork, classes, and maybe her parents. Outsiders and FBI instantly believe that the man responding back is within the belief this is literally a minor and he’s okay with this interaction. Outsiders and FBI believe that, because the woman is mentioning details a minor might actually talk about, that therefore means the man seriously thinks she’s doing exactly that. On the contrary, he believes she’s roleplaying. This is what BDSM people do, it’s their bread and butter. Ddlg involves the woman partaking in activities and interests such as coloring books, schoolwork, stuffed animals, diapers, binkies, kid clothes, crayons, etc. Not always, but it’s common. Typically, she talks in such a way that mimics how a kid would talk.
Yes, I will acknowledge that, as a cautious woman, I find it strange that a man wouldn’t ask questions to verify her real age (obviously, outsiders and FBI think the same); however, there are plenty of people out there who throw caution to the wind and just want to participate in pure Hedonism. They roleplay right out the gate, just as they believe the decoy is doing (and technically, he’s absolutely right in assuming that). We’re talking impulsive men with high sex drives (most of which do not have paraphilia for minors).
What I wouldn’t understand is why such a man would stop contact when the woman claims
she’s 12 years old. She’s just pretending, right? So why would taking that literally ever come to mind? And usually, if questions are asked about her age, the decoy dodges the question, so even if he’s skeptical, nothing comes of it. He continues talking with her because they’re both on an adult-only dating website, he expects other adults to be here, and if he is very skeptical, he might be curious to see where this goes. And from what I’ve observed, a skeptical man is the one following the woman’s lead, never the other way around.
You may be wondering why a skeptical man wouldn’t just ghost the decoy if she’s not answering questions. Often, skeptical men are like curious cats and you know what happens to curious cats. He might be suspicious he’s getting catfished, but you don’t really know until you meet the person. So you continue talking in the hopes that this person is being honest. Unfortunately for him, he doesn’t get a chance to leave upon discovering he in fact was catfished. Instead, he’s arrested on the spot because he was too open-minded, non-judgmental, and skeptical.
So because of his kink lifestyle or his curiosity for it; because of his skepticism or his Hedonism, he is put in prison for 1-10 years or for life, and registered as a sex offender, while not having a single shred of evidence supporting he might be attracted to children.
This is a war on kink, not saving children.
4 thoughts on “War on KINK”
Thank you for putting this out. I myself have been pretty naive about this. This makes a lot of sense given everything we’ve learned so far about many of the men being trapped in these online stings (on adult dating platforms) who were clearly not looking for minors (because nobody goes to adult places to find minors for this). This is just one huge reason out of many more for why these online stings that are supposedly looking for child predators should NOT be allowed to be conducted on ADULT dating platforms, where you have to register as an adult. And the decoys should definitely not be allowed to push sex onto the men, the way they always do in these sting operations, because it’s unrealistic that any real minor would be doing this or any real adult person would be demanding sex for their children from complete strangers. There are so many reasons for why men play along with them, and those reasons have absolutely nothing to do with wanting to rape children, the way these pretend heroes make them look like.
I personally think many of the people running these “child predator” online stings are very well aware about this stuff, and this is exactly why they target men on adult dating platforms/this population for this scam. They know it’s very easy to get these men to play along with them and to use them for the scam they are running.
Some of the decoys may be into BDSM themselves, and so they know very well how this works. Carlos Rodriguez was obviously familiar with this stuff. Whether he’s one that practices this or not, we know he is someone who was familiar with this and clearly had or has an interest in this.
So, yes, I agree. It’s a lot about wanting to control other people’s sex lives, but I also think it has a lot to do with their own interests (including their own sex interests, their own ego, career advancement, and of course: MONEY) None of that has anything to do with wanting to save and protect children from predators. It’s obviously just a very good cover up they came up with for the purpose of exploiting others for their self benefits.
Anybody looking for child predators on adult dating platforms or in adult sex chat rooms is clearly not trying to save or protect real children from online predators. I don’t know why there are still so many people who don’t get that. 🤦🏻♀️
Not all Conservative Christians reel in horror. Many of us are libertarian when it comes to consenting adults. Regardless, you must protect yourself. That means wearing condoms. It also means inoculating yourself against stings. Prior to a conversation turning to adult themes, quickly ask for the other person’s birth date. If they hesitate, or give an unsatisfactory answer, assume you are being recorded. Tell the other person you know you are being recorded, that you believe this to be a sting, and that you will publicize this fact. Then share this information on websites for others to see. This is about money! The more people the reign in, the more they can advertise that, and the more money they will bring in. If the supply does not meet the demand, they will create the supply by framing the innocent. Most of this crap is about justifying their existence. Deny them existence, by choking off the supply. However, don’t deny that pedophilia does not exist. If you know of something inappropriate, report. Show that you won’t accept illegal activity. By doing this, you can reduce this illegal activity, and protect yourself at the same time. Clearing Jace however is a different subject. One for which this Conservative Christian will pray.
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Agreed. My loved one is also impacted by over-reaching law enforcement. What I take away from this well-written article is that the war on Kink is a major part of the War on Sex, and it has rippling effects on ordinary people doing ordinary things. We are indeed living in the midst of a moral panic.
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I know not one person who hasn’t committed a mind crime.